As I waited for my second vaccine, assimilating the information that a reaction was likely, I felt assured that if I did indeed experience this, it would be minimal and short lived. Nothing to be concerned about, but perhaps it would be wise to leave the next day completely open. And so I did.
When the administering nurse appeared at my car window, she commented on the tininess of my physique, and I asked her of this meant that I would have a smaller dose. She said that all doses were the same size, and I silently thought, ‘uh oh and oh well’. By that evening I was feeling the onset of a powerful flu-ish ugh.
I lay down to sleep and a fever-ish heat, an intensely throbbing headache, and a firey sensitivity infiltrating every inch of my skin, took me down down down. My heavy head sunk deeply into my pillow and exhaustive asleep came.
Then music. Where did this music come from? It was all consuming and surrounded me in substance, as if transformed into a fog, not too loud and not too soft, just right. It lifted me up and my body cooled. I felt northern Michigan winds and I could see the birch trees swaying, and then, Jay and the Americans. What??? Yes. “Walkin’ in the Rain”. One of those moments when one knows that one is dreaming, but does not want to stop, “Please don’t wake up!” I said to myself. Then I was walking on the beach. Lake Michigan was lapping at my toes and I gazed down thinking a petosky stone would appear, when “Different Drum” rose up from the water and surrounded me. MARGARET!!!!!! You rascal!!!! I looked for her when a single green horsetail appeared poking up through the sand and then “This Guy’s in Love With You”rang throughout. I laughed out loud and I woke up.
I opened my eyes and found myself still hot and sprawled on my bed. The night sky was bright with clouds and the sound of rain. I opened the window to let cold wet air waft over me. Heaven.
I thanked Margaret.
I thanked my body and soul for its willingness to be vulnerable so that I could experience these moments with my sister.
I will never forget this night.